Most advanced coaches do not manage their clients, nor do they hold the client accountable. These are both useful tools when used by a manager with staff, and can work in the coaching relationship up to a point. However, the master coach wants to work with clients who want support, guidance, ideas and encouragement – not a manager.
It may seem right to expect your coach to manage you, and make sure you keep your word and get you back on track when you’ve become distracted. And you’d be right up to appoint, I mean it certainly is a part of the coaching relationship to do just that.
Of course your coach wants you to use the coaching relationship to your benefit, but don’t come into the coaching relationship assuming that your coach will make you successful. The coaching relationship is unique for most people and an intricate one as well. A successful coaching relationship begins when the coach and the client are clear about their roles, intentions and responsibilities.
Here are list of some suggestions for the coaching client to help clarify their role the coaching relationship.
- Inspire yourself and the coach
- Initiate actions and ideas
- Make the ultimate decisions
- Commit to reaching your goals
- Be responsible for what doesn’t work
- Take great care of yourself and your personal well-being
- Learn and being willing to set strong boundaries
- Run your ideas by your coach
- Clarifying and act on your vision
- Be willing to make the necessary changes for success
- Speak to the strengths of the client
- Acknowledge and champion their actions
- Listen and offer feedback and perspective
- Discover new possibilities
- Tease out and refine goals
- Stay present and aware of what’s going on for the client
- Create fresh new strategies
- No BS and tell it how it is
This list is simply a starting point for the coaching client. Basically it’s up to each party to be responsible for creating a powerful coaching relationship that leaves both people more alive as result of coaching. This advanced type of coaching basically starts when we ask the question who am I in this coaching relationship for the client and for the client to ask who am I as the client in this relationship and how do we each need to show up in this relationship for it to be mutually beneficial.
Because the coaching relationship is new for so many people, it can take a little time getting up to speed and building an ideal coaching relationship. In this type of advanced coaching relationship, remember to manage yourself, and don’t expect your coach to do it.
When you take exceptional responsibility and care of yourself, you and your coach can produce extraordinary results.
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Greg Clowminzer, San Diego Business Coach